Muslim Wives have Comfort, Ease, and Happiness:

We are not (desperate) houses' wives; we are men's wives!

Yuhaayaa L. Kaahena

 Revised Completely and Updated

Muslim

Wives

Have

Comfort

Ease

And

Happiness:

We are not (desperate) houses' wives

We are men's wives!

Yuhaayaa L. Kaahena

Yuhaaya

Detroit, Michigan

  Copyright 2005 by Latifa Abdullah

Printed in the United States of America

This book is dedicated to Religious Wives from my culture called The People of the Book.

You are in the minority according to the last US Census Report of 2002; 30% of African American women live with their mates or husbands.

To me, you are among the happiest women in America.

You are happily married, have it easy, are comfortable and loved at home, because you follow the guidance of ALMIGHTY GOD in Holy Scripture.

When I ask husbands who say that they will never leave women like you, Why? They say two words most of all: "Not mean!" You are not desperate then!

When I think of a good wife, I think of the strong African American woman in my family like my mother, aunts, and grand mothers who were with their husbands who stayed on this earth with mates until the day one of them died.

ALLAH blessed them to know how to succeed as a wife.

This book shows my appreciation of the kind of women that played the role of a mate right throughout American history. Now a minority among us, I also learned from you in Detroit as a pioneer inside of the very first house of worship for the Nation of Islam as well my role. You have achieved mastery of the wonderful life, which THE CREATOR has blessed a wife who hands hold the right thing that a sexual mate ought to possess. I thank THE LORD for this and give THE PRAISE AND GLORY to GOD!

I just wanted to write a book that has not yet been written. It is a book that views the Muslim wife but it is from an African American Muslim woman's viewpoint. Yes, we hear about us; yet, it is a view of us from men who cannot view a woman from a woman's own point to view things. This is impossible to do, just as a woman cannot picture things from a man's point of view.

While the average man can only view us from the rights that we owe them because they are our maintainers and our protectors with their physical resources; they seem unable to recognize our rights. Our role is to safeguard the type of spirit that they have within their souls, after their mothers raised them right to develop with a perfected soul; a Muslim wives keep a watch over this in order to preserve this. Still, wives only do this, after husbands maintain and protect us.

Good-naturedly, we all have GOD given rights, so we can perform the right actions that fit the natures, which THE CREATOR made for us. These rights afford us equality, freedom, peace and love. This makes it easy for us to perform our duty to THE CREATOR. Free to perform our duty to ALLAH, our life with a GOD-Fearing mate that maintains and protects us is made a comfortable one, which makes our lives together a happy one.

On the contrary, desperate housewives are not this way. They are different. The are like Eve, when she fail from Paradise, because she tried to become like a different creature: an angel with a different nature or like THE CREATOR: IMMORTAL. Afterward the first wife became ashamed; she was so frantic that Eve and Adam scrambled in the garden to find something to cover them up. Both did not want THE CREATOR to see how they defiled their once pure soul.

In Islamic Culture, wives have comfort, ease and happiness; husbands consider us helpers. For hundreds of years in American society, many mates experience sexual relationships with hopelessness and misery that lead to separation. This is obvious for those of African decent in this society during the time of slavery. Today the government has reported in its 2002 US Census report that only 30% of African American live with a mate. 70% of African American women are single heads of a household. Almost 50% of African American men have never married. The facts do not look for a success in marriage, so it is understandable to acknowledge the influence of slavery upon Americans today.

This is one reason for my writing of this book, after I wrote the book about the Muslim mother who delivers children for their souls to develop to perfection along the path back to THE CREATOR. In Islam, the raised child with a perfected soul seeks a helpmate to protect this perfected soul's advancement along its journey.

The conditions in America over hundreds of years causes problems in the average marriage. Marriage for most African American converts or reverts back to Islam is not Islamic, after the couple has been raised by a parent(s) with an American slave's mentality. In a desperate situation, rights are not given, duties are unclear, and mates are not fair to one another.

Of course, good marriages do exist in our society. The good marriage does exist and I am revealing it in my book.

For a peaceful existence in marriage, both mates can have a happy marriage, if there have been raised right. Being raised right is being able to live in a family with a good nature instead of a bad one that hurt self and others, since ALLAH has blessed us to have soul mates that love us.

If you were raised like the average American female and not in a good religious one, you may be confuse about the way that your American raised husband treats you! You may ask yourself, does he treat me right? Am I wrong because he makes me mad all of the time? It seems like one of us just always must have the last say in a matter without thinking about the other due to being worldly with a slave's mentality? Can we live together in peace like this, while we act the wrong way toward our real GOD given nature? Where did this start? . It has been revealed to us, if you come from my culture called The People of the Book, also in the Holy Quran like the Holy Bible:

Also, when we said to the angels, be submissive to Adam, they submitted except for Iblis/a devilish jinn. It refused and was too proud and it was one of the unbelievers.

And, We said: "Oh Adam, you live and your wife in the garden, and eat from it plenty wherever you wish to and approach not this tree, unless you be of the unfair."

But, the devil/Iblis made them slip from it, and caused them to depart from the state in which they were within. And we said: "Go forth, some of you are the enemies of others and there is for you in the earth an abode and a provision for a time." 2:34-36

Next thing to experience, after being fair they became unfair: enemies, the once good state of paradise to mates fail from. . Instead of the kind of relationship that was plenty enough for both, they still were not satisfied just with what THE CREATOR made for them. They wanted more, so it was not what was made for them to have. The wanted a tree something in the earth; it has a nature of being grounded in the earth without the free to move about. This lead to the state of confusion in marriage to this day. ALLAH revealed to Prophet Muhammad (Peace and Blessings of ALLAH be Upon him-PBUH) the .the reason for being confuse.

We indeed know what the earth diminishes of them and with us is a book that preserves

No, they reject the Truth, when it comes to them, so they are in a state of confusion. 50: 4-5

Consequently, Holy Scripture upholds reality in order to preserve us from the things that this world diminishes of us. ALLAH revealed the same things to Prophet Muhammad concerning his wives; Muhammad forbid them the life of this world and he had to let them depart for this very reason from a good state.

The Prophet, say to your wives: "If it comes the time you to met with this world's life and its beauty, then you deviate from the right way (to oppose him) I supply you provisions, and let you go by a decorated dismissal.

And if it comes to you that you met with ALLAH and HIS Messenger and the life of the Hereafter, then ALLAH actually prepared for the good doers of you to have a reward of importance. 33: 28-29

Confusion is a sure sign of denial of the real truth; then this is a sure indication of acting the wrong way as a mate. Our first parts departed from a state of paradise, when they took a forbidden thing. Prophet Muhammad told his wives that their marriage life is diminished, by the life of this world, which the influence of American slavery has proven in African American sexual relationships. The believer of the truth is told to not live for this world but live for what to come hereafter. The Book of ALLAH preserves our life during our return back to paradise.

A house is a thing of this world's life for example. It one day will vanish from the face of this earth. In fact, it only takes minutes to demolish. It does not have eternal life like ALLAH does, so why does the typical American housewife work more on keeping up the house then on keeping up her duty to ALLAH? I call them housewives. They only stay with a man to have the house and other property; usually it's the main reason to marry him. What about the only thing that goes back to paradise or the hereafter or the soul. Religious wives work on this more!

Even ALLAH'S Messenger did not seek any monetary reward for his work here on earth, he asked to be paid something good for the soul. Who can appreciate this more than a wife with the God given role to fit one's nature to believe in the unseen life and to guard it. Prophet Mohammed's work was similar without payment in return of something physical on earth like a frantic housewife.

Say, "No reward do I ask you for this except the love of those near of kind/family." Also, whoever earns good, we give him more good therein…. Holy Quran: 42:23

How many times, if you ask a wife or a husband, will the person say that the reason together is not for the property like during the time of American slavery but the real reason is to work to gain the love of a relative? This concept maybe too confusing and impossible to the average American if the person is under the influenced the slave experience here. However, if we go back to the beginning, it is clearer. .

Let's begin at the start with the created order established by THE CREATOR for us. We did not decree it but it was ordered for us to exist this way according to Holy Quran:

The likeness of Jesus with ALLAH is indeed as the likeness of Adam. HE made him from dust, the said to him, "Be", and so he was. 3:58

HE WHO made you from clay also did decree a course for you. A point in time is set, so is with HIM yet you still doubt! 6:2

Act kindly towards women, for they were created from a rib (Adams's) and the most crooked part of a rib is its top. If you try to straighten it out you will break it, if you leave it alone, it will stay crooked, so act good-natured towards women (Muslim and Bukhari)

Eve the wife of Adam was made a different way. Adam was made out of dust; then, Eve was made out of his rib. The male and female are made differently for a reason: different roles. The male was blessed to materialize first. This made him have a degree of power over the female who has less physical strength in need of something from him. Consequently, his natural role has been to provide for a wife and to maintain her to stay pure and perform his duty by THE CREATOR.

Likewise, the male has been given to the female his sperm or life-germ; she has not been given him her bloody eggs for him to keep. With naturally more physical possessions to give to a female, this shows the decree to which men have naturally been blessed with material thing in their physical makeup beyond women. Likewise, women have been authorized by THE CREATOR to do something to a decree above men.

If a woman is with a man who does not live true to his nature, she may get confuse about her own nature. Behind the slaver experience, wherein the African American male was not considered enough of a man to own property, including his own body most of the time, the man was not allowed to live his in Africa. The little time alone with his mate, the only thing to give her was his GOD given nature with the degree of physical endowment to have. He could give her love for example and act her equal, as she worked to guard his unseen life for the hereafter. The Muslim slaves probably look at slave masters from this point of view:

"Know that the life of this world is only play, and idle talk, and pageantry, and boasting among you, and competing in regards to wealth and children. As the likeness of vegetation after the rain, where at the growth, it is pleasing to the husbandman but it afterward dried up and you saw it turn yellow; then, it became straw. Next in hereafter there is a punishment of grief, and forgiveness from ALLAH and HIS good pleasure. Seeing that, the life of the world is (nothing else) aside from a matter of delusion. 57: 20

When we look at the facts, we will see the influence of degrading American slavery and racism on the average African American marriage today, since it reveals the America life style instead of the Islamic way to live. In just 50 years, the rate of divorce has doubled in our community. According to the US Census report of 2002. In 1950 around 60% of African American females lived with their mates; three years ago in 2002 around 30% lived with their husbands, so 70% of women are now heading a household without their mates. We know how the life of this world diminishes us for hundreds of years.

Hence, it s the religious African American couple that know better Both do their duty to ALLAH. They do not work for anything in this world. The experience of slavery made it even easier to do for the righteous ones among us. We were forced into separation from a life of pageantry, boasting of wealth being able to compete with each other at slave auctions for children. It is all a delusion and to know it!

In other words, the average African Americans was not married in 2002 according to the American government. 48% were married but out of this number 5% were separated, 9% widowed, 12% divorced, that left around 35% presently in a relationship. 52% were not married at the time. In 2002, 48% of black men had never married and for black women 42%. This shows how many are still with a slave's mentality.

At the same time, around 70% of black women head a household, while 17% of African American men were imprison, 10% were married to women from a different race or were unable to marry due to unemployment. The life of this world according to the white male's order that is established to have control over every created thing, which 100% insane only brings lost and misery to our society. It is not the order made by THE CREATOR, that is the real established order in creation. Being different, this order leads us to ease and happiness. .

We can understand a state of desperation does exist in the typical American household of an African American. There is much anger from past experience(s), awful anxiety, and dread of being married. In fact, the African American male has the largest amount of men in the American population that has never even been married. This explains some of the desperation in the American way of life from the start. Does this not bring to mind the influence of the American lifestyle of white male domination upon the ignorant black family? There is only two ways to go the right way to prosper or the wrong way that leads astray into the way to our destructive. The Quran reveals this:

HE/ALLAH said: "What hindered you so that you did not submit, when I commanded you?" He (Satan) said: "I am better than him (Adam); YOU have created me (devil) of fire, while YOU did make him dust."

HE said: "Then go ahead from this (state), for it is not for you to behave therein proud." "Go ahead, therefore you assuredly are from the wicked ones (to degrade)."

He/Satan said: "Give me the period until the day, when they are raised."

HE said: "You are indeed among the respite ones (to delay punishment)."

He/devil said: "As YOU have settled me to be erring, I will certainly lie in wait for them in YOUR straight path-way,"

"Then I will certainly come up to them from in front of them and from behind them and from their right and from their left and YOU will not find most of them thankful."

HE said: "Get out of it (state of paradise), being despised and driven away. Whoever of them will follow you, I will certainly fill hell with you all."

Plus, (we said) "Oh Adam, you and your wife live in the garden, so consume from wherever you to wish to, but do not go near this tree, or else you become of the unjust."

But the devil made an evil suggestion to them, so that he might make manifest to them that which had been hidden from them of their shame, and he said, " THE LORD has forbid you this tree; otherwise, you become angels or become of the immortals.'

Also, he swore to both of them; surely, I am a sincere adviser to you.

Thus, he caused them to fall by deceit, so when they had experience of the tree, their shame became manifest to them (unfair), and both (desperate) began to cover up themselves with the leaves from the garden. And THE LORD called out to them: "Did I not forbid you that tree and say to you that the devil is certainly your visible enemy?" 7:12-22

At the same time, the average African American woman is in a frenzy and frightening situation, because she must head a household with at lest one child by herself. More are single women without helpmates to maintain and provide them and the children according to the above report. This condition started during slavery, when the slave men were not allowed to own property for hundred and hundreds of years to maintain and protect their families. After slavery things got better for a while. However, as we can see, things did not stay that way. The best thing for a man to live up to is his duty to THE CREATOR: a faithful servant. This means providing for his family to preserve their life to perform their duties to THE CREATOR also.

What makes life good for a woman? For the nature GOD has given a woman, what is best way for a woman to live? In fact, the way for a woman to get things, a man just cannot see how she did it. Still, a woman can get things in a way that may be hard for others to see with their physical eyes, since she may not have had not to work with her physical hands to get things like a man. This is a major difference between the sexes.

Behold! Wife of Imran said, "Oh The LORD of me! I do dedicate to YOU what is inside my womb for YOUR special service, so accept this of me: for YOU hear and know all things."

When she was delivered, She said, "Oh The LORD of me! I have delivered a female child!" And ALLAH knew best what she brought forth "And the male is not like the female. I have named her Mary. Also, I commend her and her offspring to YOUR protection from Satan, the rejected one."

Right happily did The LORD of her, Mary, accept her: HE made her grow in purity and beauty. In the care of Zakariya, she was assigned. Every time, he entered into her room to see her, he found her supplied with sustenance. He said: "Oh Mary! From where did this come to you?" She said: "From ALLAH for ALLAH provides sustenance to whom HE pleases without measure." 3: 35-37

Again at the time when Mary delivered Jesus and showed him to their people, Mary’s story reveals the ability of a female.

So she conceived him, Jesus, and she retired with him to a remote place.

And the pains of childbirth drove her to the trunk of a palm-tree; she cried (in anguish): ‘Ah! That I would have died before this! That I would had been a thing forgotten and out of sight!"

But (a voice) cried to her from beneath; "Grieve not, for The LORD of you had provided a stream beneath you;

And shake towards you the trunk of the palm-tree; it will let fall fresh ripe dates upon you."

"So eat and drink and cool (your) eye. Also, if you do see any man, say, "I have vowed a fast to THE MOST GRACIOUS and this day, I will not enter into a conversation for any person."

At length, she brought (baby) to her people. They said, "O Mary! Truly an amazing thing you have brought.

Oh sister of Aaron! You father was not a man of evil, nor you mother an unchaste woman."

But she just pointed to the baby, they said: "How can we talk to one who is a child in the cradle?"

He said: "I am indeed a servant of ALLAH; HE has given me revelation and made me a prophet;

And HE has made me blessed where ever I be, and has enjoined on me prayer and charity as long as I live;

(HE) has made me kind to my mother, and not overbearing or miserable,

so, peace is on me the day I was born, the day that I die and the day that I will be raised up to life (again)!" 19:22-33

This shows the difference between the female and male with the female's greater capacity to handle our unseen life like Mary. The female is made from a human rib, which is a concealed thing hidden under the skin like a fetus is hidden in a woman's womb. With a nature to support the unseen life of a human being, a wife's role is to preserve it for a state of paradise. Since Eve was made from Adam's bent rib, the female has been made from the part of us to protect the human heart or the rib(s).

Being able to bend, the yielding female keeps a person free to serve ALMIGHTY GOD. Yielding Mary even said to not speak for another, so she just pointed to her son, when her people could not see it. She delivered her son from her. She moved out of his way, so that he acted according to the role THE CREATOR gave him. Thus, we are different with different abilities and the different strengths that comes with the differences, making us equally blessed with a role to play, but with different roles and different abilities to complete our duty to ALLAH. We are different. Yet, both have a decree more of something than the other, which equals out. The way that is made is for the duty to have to GOD!

Also, I have not created the jinn and the men expect that they should serve ME. Al Quran: 51:56

To see, we cannot exist unfair about being made with different abilities in order to do a different job for THE CREATOR. ALLAH makes us miserable as a punishment; we try to take the superior position above another creature, if we don't like the way that is made to act. ALLAH is THE SUPERIOR ONE over the creation. Prophet Muhammad told a husband to not do this out of regard for THE CREATOR:

Prophet Muhammad said: "A Muslim must not hate his wife, and if he is displeased with one bad quality in her, then let him be pleased with one that is good in her." (Muslim)

A woman is like a rib, if you try to straighten it out you will break it, and if you enjoy her, you will still do so regardless from her crookedness." (Muslim and Bukhari reported he (PBUH) said)

Women throughout history were unjustly considered inferior on account of our less superior physical strength than males. It was during the time of Prophet Muhammad in Arabia like it is still today in American's system of white male control. This world's life never seems to change, until THE CREATOR changes the order for the day! Holy Quran revealed this unfairness to the female during Prophet Mohammed's time.

And when mankind is united

And when the one (a daughter) is buried alive is asked

For what sin she was killed

And when the books are spread

And when the heaven has its covering removed

And when hell (fire) is kindled

Also when the Garden/Paradise is brought near

Every soul will know what it has prepared. 81: 7-14

Tell the Believers to forgive those who do not look for the day of ALLAH, so that HE may reward people according to their deeds. A person, who does what is right, does it for advantage to own self and a person who commits evil does so to own danger. The Lord of all of you returns.

45:14-15

A time comes when the old order or system of things changes for the order THE CREATOR made for the new order. Today, we often hear that we are living in the last days, which is true. I watched some victims of hurricane Katrina. The women before it raised their children alone in poor living conditions, after (Katrina) they have been raising their children in new furnished homes, and with better schools without paying one cent for rent due to Section 8. They are able to live like Mary with all the provisions to need that some may be unable to see it, because there were others in the same news story that just could not understand the blessed mothers in a living situation that was better then their own. There was obvious a new order, called the days of ALLAH. . I consider it a reward from ALLAH for living according to their female nature.

In the old Arabian order of male domination over the female because of different in the ability to get things in way that some men just could not see it. They only saw their daughters as an extra mouth to feed without any other value to them, .so they buried them alive. Consequently, the females wanted to know for what sin was she killed! Prophet Muhammad continued to remind his nation of the unjust treatment to women in his last sermon, and he told the believers how to treat women like criminals instead of good servants of ALLAH.

"…Interact with woman kindly, for they are (your) Prisoners; you have no more power over them than that, if they are to blame for open lewdness. Then, refuse to share their beds, and beat them, but not severely, but if they return to obedience; seek not against them a means to annoy (them). You have rights over your women and they have rights over you. Your right over them is that they should not entertain at your home anyone (commit adultery) and not to allow into your house anyone whom you dislike, and their right over you is that you should feed and clothe them well."

The TV show Desperate Housewives began a new season on a Sunday night in September around 28,000,000 fans watched. It was reported on a news show the next morning. A supporter or an admirer is a person who is called a fan. Thus, there are Americans with a level of education/culture like the characters of the show, which can relate to!

One of the characters is married, but she is not sure who is her baby's daddy. Another character is a mother who spends most of her time at work for her professional career and no or little time with her growing young children. THE CREATOR made her a mother, something no other creature can make. Another character is a single father who is raising the children: a mother's job. These characters are hurt and unfair to themselves and they hurt others and are unfair to them.

From slavery till today, the American culture continues to show the white male system. Women are bad in such a system. They have transgressed their nature by working for a man more than ALLAH. This makes women appear crazy as well. They get hurt, beat or abandoned, under such a system like that in Arabia, wherein the white male holds the image of god in his religion. This also makes the female appear stupid, regardless of the educational level; Muslimahs believe different!

Next, we have a real situation in marriage to account for mates wives being desperate, wanting to cover or hide the shameful things to do in the TV services and throughout American history. Knowing this, the African American Muslim slave women were able to survive hundreds of years of injustice in the legally accepted American sexual relationshi0ps of slave women being made from the rib of a man. It is a well know fact that some African American slave women mated for life with their slave masters who took care of the offspring from this kind of mating relationship as well, like Thomas Jefferson and the slave woman Sally for example. In Al-Islam, this kind of sexual relationship is legal and I will go into it in more detail later in the book. Thomas was not the only American president who mated with an African American slave woman.

Oh you Believers! Indeed among your mates/wives and your children are enemies to you, so beware of them! Still, if you forgive, overlook, and cover up (their failures) truly, ALLAH is MOST OFTEN FORGIVING, MOST MERCIFUL. 64: 14

And it is not your wealth, nor your children, that brings you nearer to us, but only he who believes and acts right; as for such, theirs will be twofold reward for what they did and they will reside in the high dwellings in peace and security. 34:37

The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said: "ALLAH has some persons in Paradise to rule there (and to enjoy a dignified position); they are the people to meet the needs of their brethren." (al-Usul al-Kafi, pp.476)

Out of desperation and being fearful of the consequences of being unfair, the first mates opened the door to a state, which has been present to this day. THE CREATOR gave Adam guidance in order to show both the different ways for a human to go. One way leads to paradise, while the other way makes life hell. The way to do this is be one way or the other is determined by way to act fair. Being true to one's real nature and treating one's mate right for his true nature, when he acts the right way, makes one's life together like the heavenly order for paradise. In Holy Scripture, the heavenly order of justice toward a creature in order to work for THE CREATOR foremost is revealed:

By the sun and its standing out,

Also, the moon when it borrows light from it (sun),

Plus, the day when it exposes it (sun) to view,

And, the night when it draws a veil over it (sun),

Also, the heaven and its makeup,

Also, the soul and its perfection,

HE reveals to it its way of evil and its way of good.

Also, he indeed fails who buries it.

Thamud rejected, the truth, by their going beyond their own limitations: sin, when the lost ones of them came out with being hurtful. Thus, ALLAH’S Messenger said to them (leave alone) ALLAH’S she camel, let her drink to.

On the contrary, they called him a liar and took her life. So The LORD of them destroyed them for their sins, made them depress, leveled them with the ground-lifeless)

Also, He does not fear its consequences. 91:1-15

This leads to one's decline and panic for a fearful situation for a decreased existence with disgrace for being more than what to suppose to be: ashamed. In the heavenly order of things, creatures assist and support each other to stay in their natural place and carry out their duty for THE CREATOR'S Praise and Glory! This place affords the creature an exalted state in comparison to others because of the different ability to have to work for ALLAH. This way one creature is not superior to another, so it is a sign of THE MOST HIGH GOD!

ALLAH enjoins justice, kindness, and in giving charity to relatives. HE forbids indecency, hatred, and oppression. HE exhorts you that you may take heed. Al Quran 16:90

Hence, being religious keeps us clean or pure. One is not feeling ashamed about one's unfairness to a mate. A mate is not acting like is over the other: more superior. Both are free to work for THE CREATURE'S praise and glory. Both are free to appear their natural selves.

"A woman may be married for four things for her wealth for her noble descent for her beauty or for her religion. Choose the one who is religious (to succeed) without this, your hands are rubbed with dust (Muslim Bukhari)

Ma'qil b. Yasar said: a man came to the Prophet (PBUH) and said: "I have found a woman of rank and beauty but she does not give birth to children. Should I marry her? He said: "No." He came again to him but he prohibited him. He came to him the third time and he (Prophet) said: "Marry women who are loving and very yielding/prolific, for I will outnumber the people by you." (Sunan Abu Dawud)

Abu Hurairah reported ALLAH'S Messenger said:

"A woman may be married for four reasons: for her property, her status, her beauty, and her religion; so try to get one whom religious to prosper."

(Muslim and Bukhari)

Nevertheless, if a man marries to get something in this world from a woman. He has transgressed his nature and refused to do his duty to ALLAH. A husband's duty is to go get the things in the earth and to share them with a wife instead of marriage to a wife, which makes it so that he does not have to do this. There is just kind of Muslim woman that a poor Muslim man is allowed to marry. provide for her at the time of marriage. I will reveals more about her later in this book.

Also, the divorced women should keep themselves in waiting for three menstrual cycles/courses. And it is not lawful for them to conceal that which ALLAH has created in their wombs, if they believe in ALLAH and the Last Day. Plus, their husbands have more right to take them back in the mean time, if they wish for reconciliation. Besides, women will have rights that are like the rights (of men) toward them according to what is evenhanded but men have a degree above them. Moreover, ALLAH is ALMIGHTY, THE MOST WISE. 2:228

It is HE WHO has made you HIS agents, inheritors of the earth; HE has raised you in ranks, some above others, so that HE may try you in gifts, which HE has given you. For THE LORD of you HE is quick in punishment, yet HE is surely7 OFTEN-FORGIVING< MOST MERCIFUL. Holy Quran 6: 165

With a 50% divorce rate presently, many American people appear confuse about marriage, when they even come from a culture of people with a history of being the People of the Book. This means the people whose story is in the Holy Scripture(s) from the lands in which all three sections of Holy Scripture is made. There was no mentioning of Adam and Eve's divorce. The prophets did not divorce their wives down to and including Prophet Muhammad, since one of his wives divorced him before any sexual intercourse; although, THE CREATOR has been permitting us of the most hated of things to create.

Moses allowed the Jewish man to divorce in Deuteronomy and Christ allowed the Christen man to divorce in Matthew. Muhammad began the allowance of Muslim women the right to divorce like the Muslim men in Al Quran 4: 128-130. He even allowed one of his won wives to divorce him before they have sex in the marriage. It is easy to understand the desperation in American wives and fear of a 50% divorce rate with a diminished existence.

Ibn Umar reported the Prophet as saying: Of all the lawful acts the most detestable to ALLAH is divorce. (SAD # 2173)

Woman was created from a (man's) rib. She will never be straightforward and consistent for you in any way. If you enjoy her (the relationship), you will do so regardless of her crookedness. If you try to straighten her out, you will break her, and her breaking is her divorce. (Muslim hadith)

In a society, where there is a white male system of domination, the average American woman lives under a male's rule and power instead of religious law. Therefore, these women actually think and feel that to beautify them selves is only way to lure a man to provide for them. There is a lot of entertainment with sexual acts with people other than mates, which is not in marriage. You see it in movies, books, DVD, records at the job, or on the block on TV and online. It is wherever to look in this world's life that is not a religious life.

It is as American as apple pie to have a boyfriend or girlfriend instead of wife or husband. I believe American acceptance of this life for the African American over hundreds of years, broke the human spirit and keep families torn apart made. This became an accepted existence to the slaves. Naturally hurt people are going to expect to get nothing but hurt out of each other. Domestic violence and child abuse is a gigantic problem in the black community.

Living lawless for hundreds of years, it is easy for a woman to feel, when she goes outdoors into the American environment with people of various beliefs that women are bad, crazy and stupid with men and other women needing to act skeptical of you. Is this not how prison guards treat prison inmates?

Men, who do not even know you, they will first act as if you, a female, cannot be trusted. This is hurtful to women and so degrading to lead to greater anxiety or desperation and fear. Even if you do not embellish yourself with makeup, sexy clothes and other adornments to attract men for their money, the average African American male acts too confuse to tell a religious woman from a worldly one outdoors.

If we just stop and think, ALLAH protected the good Muslim woman of African decent for hundreds of years. As salves, they did not embellish them selves with decorations to appear more beautiful. Watching out for us, the slave woman is depicted with a scarf on her had, long dress, scarf around her breast, and no makeup. They sure did not look like the women in the videos to see today. There was no reason for them to lure men for marriage. Muslim women are still naturally modest today. It is easy for a convert or reverts to dress modest.

In conclusion, I gave examples of a desperate housewife. It started with the first wife and husband, when both disobeyed ALLAH to treat each other unfair to straying to a tree something that exist in this world's life. Next, human beings became enemies. In a frantic situation and afraid of being on a destructive course, both opened another way for their offspring to take. However, we are given guidance to find our way back to a state of paradise with a mate. What is living this state of obedience to ALLAH like for a wife?

And the soul and its perfection, so HE reveals to it its way of evil and its way of good: indeed, he succeeds who purifies it, and he already has failed whosoever corrupts it. 91: 7-10